A Letter to Joe Smoker
Thursday, December 14th, 2006
Dear Smoker Who Walks In Front Of Me,
I hate you. Please kill yourself and I mean more expeditiously than you already are with your nasty habit.
Do you realize that when you blow out your gross, smelly cigarette exhaust it does not magically dissipate into the environment without affecting anyone around you? I do not appreciate having to breathe in the stuff that even you, who regularly ingest cancer fumes, don’t want. It makes me cough, it makes me gag, and it frequently leaves me with a burning sensation in my chest.
You obviously don’t care about the lingering smell that your smoking habit causes. You don’t seem to care that the smell is on your breath. You don’t seem to care that the smell is on your cloths. You don’t seem to care that your stench remains on the elevator long after you’ve exited. But guess what? I care DO about my hygiene and don’t appreciate your smoke being blown onto my clothing and into my hair.
I’m not asking you to quit smoking. I couldn’t care less what you do. I am, however, asking you to quit smoking anywhere near me. Smoke in your house or in your car. Smoke where only you have to deal with the stinky, cancerous fumes you emit into the air. It’s your habit and I don’t need to be a part of it.
Thank you for your time and please enjoy your impending emphysema.
Yours in Hate,
Dr. Blogstein
