BANNED BY BLOGSTEIN! II
It’s been a while since I did humanity a favor and taught annoying people how to behave. After my first BANNED BY BLOGSTEIN! ran in May, the world became an estimated 12.7% less irritating. Hopefully BANNED BY BLOGSTEIN! II will do the same.
The following is what I’d like to ban. . .
BANNED! The Blackberry Seriously, do you really need to be that connected? Is a cell phone not enough? Why do you need your hotmail or AOL mailbox to travel with you everywhere you go? I don’t know about you, but I don’t need to get offers for penile implants or Viagra when I’m in a meeting or at the movies. And how do they all know about my shortcomings anyway?!?
BANNED! Moots-A-Rel Cheese It’s mozzarella! Pronounce the “A”! Its “maht-suh-rehl-la” Cheese! I love how people try to sound all fancy, like they know Italian, and cut off the vowels at the end of each word. “Yeah, uh, I’ll have the proshoot.” No, lame-o, you’ll have prosciutto, pronounced “proh-shoo-toh.” You don’t know Italian, if you did, you’d be pronouncing the words correctly. Get over your pretentious self. You’re a big-a moron!
BANNED! “Good Times” Ever like to hang out with old friends and take a stroll down memory lane? Telling old stories about fun and humorous experienced together is one of the main benefits of having friends (or so I’m told.) But when the story is over, the story is over. There is no need to reinnerate that those were “good times” by ending each story by stating “good times.” Its redundant, annoying and you got it from the old Saturday Night Live skit making fun of public radio.
There, that should do it. That should hold the world over until I can ban some more that keeps the human race from being perfect.
Rules, Humor, Life, pet peeves, pet-peeves, Italian, Food, Friends, Saturday Night Live, SNL, Television, TV, Entertainment, blackberry, Email, Spam
July 12th, 2006 at 2:21 am
What the hell, doc? Ban “Good Times?” What do you have against the great Jimmie “JJ” Walker? DY-NO-MITE! I oughta….
Ohhhh, you mean the term good times… Well, that’s different. I don’t like it either. Never mind.
July 12th, 2006 at 2:23 am
Don’t you worry, Big Al, JJ can stay. Good Times the show will never be banned! DY-NO-MITE!
July 12th, 2006 at 10:42 pm
Believe me Doc, I have tried and failed, but I simply cannot agree more with the banning of Blackberry.
Why don’t they call it ‘Inappropriate size and shape-berry’? It’s about as useful as a Sinclair C5.
Oh that reminds me, I must put mine on charge…Oops, I mean, I must remind my neighbour to put his on charge.
July 13th, 2006 at 1:14 am
Are those Blackberry things (or whiteberry as Dr. Blogstein doesn’t see color) as popular in the UK as they are here?
July 15th, 2006 at 5:26 am
Banning, “You know”, “Guess what?” and “Stop me if you’ve heard this one” would not be oppposed by all right thinking human beings.
July 15th, 2006 at 2:59 pm
I don’t really mind “Guess what?” In fact, I always try to guess, usually something totally inane.